Time for what you've all been waiting for...dang it

Yeah...it's almost been a month since this happened. But I was behind on posts and a little busy and well...not feeling like doin this post. (it's happened before)

But here it is world.
The "Russell-leaving-me post."

side note: You might notice that I added some new songs to my playlist...well blog, I added some songs that are just creepin my life..for instance Living In Your Letters. Hmm...interesting. Been my favorite for some time now.
But another song I added was mine and Russell's song from The Goofy Movie-
Nobody Else But You. (we say I'm Goofy and he is Max)
Love it. Check it out if you need a reminder of its goodness :)

Alright well...let's start this cry-fest.

I guess people see that it is hard for me to part with loved ones. I mean, the day Ellen moved I had 12 people ask me how I was holding up. (no exaggeration)
After Russell's "opportunity-to-speak-before-his-mission" they would congratulate him and wish him luck, and then come to me and comfort me.
His farewell was on our birthday. I'll be honest I completely forgot it was my birthday! I was only thinking about Russell and his talk.I was so nervous before! I sat in the front row by my girls because it was too crowded where my family was..and my girls pretty much just grabbed me and sat me by them. hehe Maybe because they could see my hands shaking, my eyes already filling up with tears, and were excited to see the rare sight of me crying...and crying hard. hehe
Really though, I could not hold still. The girls were there to try and calm me down though. During the sacrament I had to force myself to stop thinking about Russell and focus on the sacrament instead.
I cried the whole meeting dang it. Everytime I would look up at him, especially when he would look back. When the Calton's would talk about Russell and his incredible example, when they talked about my boys and how excited and ready they were for missions. When Russell stood up to speak, when he said anything-especially the words Mission and Germany. When he would get emotional and tear up talking about the gospel and his family. When my grandfather gave him mission advice, and pointed out how his family, friends and angel twin sister were supporting and loved him. Wow I had serious cry-face! I think I cried even more because I was so embarrassed of my cry-face. hehe Anyway, brother did an amazing job. I was/am so proud.

I had to go back down to Provo that night cuz I'm stinkin in college. But to be honest, I was home so much that it was weird being down there still. Tuesday afternoon I went back up to Murray for his setting apart. My grandfather got to set him apart. It was amazing, loved it. He was now ELDER Irion. Wow he was happy.

Well, that night he had the boys come over to say goodbye. Gosh that was hard to watch. We all just sat and talked for a while, but then it was getting late (for a missionary) and wow reader, watching best friends say goodbye was awful. Watching the boys cry and thank him and everything made me cry for sure. While they were doing their "mission goodbye rituals" Ellen happened to call. I had cry-voice and sounded funny but it was good to hear from her and know that she was thinking of me. (thanks again ell bell)We went inside and packed up a few things, and Russell got ready for bed. I couldn't leave his room. We talked and talked. Because he couldn't listen to music we started singing our song. I made him take a picture in a pose like in Saturday's Warrior (the twins do this-so whenever Russell would touch my leg I would quickly get into this pose and he would always get mad...not tonight :) hehe) We did our "simultaneous light switches" with the light and his lamp that we always used to do,
then we said "gute Nachtbruder" and "gute Nachtschwester" and I shut the door and
went over to Sam's to bawl.
The next morning I had to go to Provo cuz of class. I had to just meet up with the family at the Brick Oven for lunch. Russell didn't eat much- he was so anxious! We went down the street from my apartment to the MTC (can I just say how crazy that is?). We took the beloved pics in front of the MTC sign and in we went. Russ was so stoked he just wanted to get in there! We took the pictures in the front room and off we went to the dreaded "goodbye room"
I couldn't sing Called To Serve- too choked up. I couldn't look at Russell. I couldn't look at my mom. I could only look at the ceiling so my tears wouldn't come out. But wow could I NOT look at him saying goodbye to the family! I just had to sit in my own little world because I couldn't handle watching that, and also knew people were watching me too. I hugged him so tight and finally got the words "I love you. I'm so proud of you. I'm gonna miss you better half" out. He said "I love you too. Thanks for everything Linds. I'll miss you. Love you" and I had to let go so the others could hug him. Yes, I got another quick hug in there again..ahh I'm gonna miss those hugs. Then I stared as he smiled and walked away to the Missionary door.Overall I think I did a great job in there.. I got myself together by time we were in the hall. The fam came and hugged me and comforted me. But yeah, I did better than I was thinking I would do...so I was pleased. (p.s. That cute boy wore the tie I gave him for his birthday. love him)

I kinda just sat around for a while that day until Joe Tom and Christie took me out to dinner. They know how to cheer me up ;) But really, the next couple of days were fine. I think I was still in denial. I waved at the MTC when I drove to the temple down the street and when I drove home that Sunday. Luckily/Unluckily, it wasn't till Sunday when it really hit me and was real hard for me. Even though the whole family was there, I just sat in silence. I was missing MY spouse (everyone else has one..) I didn't even know where to sit at the table. haha It was just really weird for me to be there without him. It had finally hit me that he was gone.

This is uber long and I apologize world. So I will keep the conclusion short and sweet.
I love getting emails and letters- especially ones he sends to my apartment.
I am so proud of Elder Irion and know he will do an amazing job.
I am so grateful to have Russell as my better half.
I love and miss him with all that I am.
Most of all i'm grateful that "It's just our luck, we're stuck together.
Nobody else but you"

you know you're missed when...

I will admit, that it is pretty hard for me to go home now-a-days because Russell isn't there (I know I know, i'll post about that depression later ;) hehe).

I guess it's hardest when i'm home alone and just go take naps in his room, or just walk around the house.
But it is all worth it when my family and friends come over.

You know you're missed when "your boys" text or call you and see when you will be home next so you can play. I guess before Russell left I never really saw myself calling his buddies to hang out, but I would go crazy without them! We mostly talk about Russ or their upcoming missions, but I just love it. I love when they come over and say "is Russ just downstairs?" because they are joking of course, but I know it's hard for them too- I know they aren't just giving me a hard time. You know you're missed when you go to sunday school and the guys sit by you and visit the whole lesson (sorry dad). I love forgetting school and responsibility and just relaxing with my boys. You know you're missed when the boys ask when you will be home next and have to promise them that you will call them once ya get back and that you won't have a boyfriend while at college. hehe

You know you're missed when you surprise your friends that you're home and they scream and run up to hug you. When all you want to do is sit and talk and will be so content with life. When they show up wherever you are-even if it's awkward or lame. When your friends-and their families- want you to come visit whenever you can. When they hesitate to say "when will I see you next?" or "I'll see you in a few weeks" You know you're missed when they tear up when they see you, or when you have to say goodbye again. When they won't let go of a hug because we both don't want to go home.

You know you're missed when right when you open the front door you hear cheering. When your parents and sisters put their arms up and smile wide once they see you. When you don't have to do any chores around the house. When my mom was sad she couldn't sit by me at the Relief Society meeting and when you have to promise to sit by her at dinner after. When she kicks your sister out of "Lindsay's spot." You know you're missed when your older sisters don't mind when you follow them everywhere around the house. When they act really interested in what I have to say. When you are offered SO much of your favorite foods. When mom gets upset that we didn't get to hang out very much because of our busy schedules. Oh, and when Molly wags her tail a little extra for you.

You know you're missed when your nieces and nephews become an extra shadow. When they sprint to you to give bear hugs and never let go. When they say "every time I come over I hope you are home!" When they ask you time and time again to play this game or this activity. When you ask if you can go to a friends house and they say "can I come with you?!" You know you're missed when the kids say "goodbye! I love you! peace out, Love you!" over and over. When they give you just one more hug before you go. And after you let go they walk away and say "I just wish Lindsay didn't ever have to leave this house" (-tyler)

Thanks for making coming home so worth it! And making me feel not-so-alone.
I love you, I miss you, I want to hold you in my arms!

Movin Down South

Hard to believe that this is the new "home" (or as Thomas Calton says- fake home) But it has been really fun to be on my own with "my place" "my groceries" "my kitchen" weird. hehe I'm very grateful to be so close to home though. I can't imagine having to pack pretty much everything and not being able to go home for the weekend and grab what you forgot or what you need. Lucked out for sure. :) Anyway, I'm on campus at Heritage in Horne Hall (the E is silent alright? ;) hehe )
There's a pic of my crib. hehe Christie and I have matchy matchy beds thanks to our angels mothers. Funny story actually- our other roomates from Colorado (Katie) and California (Andrea) had matchy beds too! Some sort of awesome voodoo goin on there...Too bad Shalece and Kenzie didn't get the memo...
The first morning, Chrisite and I made ourselves some delicious parfaits for breakfast. Yes we are nerds and decorated them! hehe We had placemats and tucked our napkins into our shirts too...then our roomate Andrea walked in and thought we were bizarre!
I was in Murray for my birthday for Russell's farewell, but when I came back to my apartment this thing was on the outside of our apartment door! That came down quick hehe
My roomies also decorated the kitchen for me. They are so cute and thoughtful! Pleasant surprise for me :) Really though.. I love all of my roommates! They are all so cute, way easy to talk to, and we have a ton of fun! I'm so excited to learn more about them and get even closer.
That night we met our Family Home Evening group...this was their present to me. hehe They had secretly opened the fruit by the foot and wrote the message, then glued it back shut! I didn't even notice! eye on the prize my friend...hehe I'm so spoiled.

The "night crew" hehe almost every night Christie and I go clean up the kitchen and do whatever needs to be done. Our roomates probably think we are psycho...but hey, as far as Christie and I see it...they should be happy about it right?
We kept up the decorations and switched the LINDS on the wall to KENZIE because it was our roomates birthday a few days later. We had to switch it up a little though, so Shalece and I bought 28 balloons to fill up the kitchen. The funny part is that Shalece had to run to class...so I walked from the creamery to our apartment looking like this. This one girl tried not to stare, and I just laughed. Good experience :)

My first BYU game. Yes you better believe it was the game vs. UCLA! 59-0 Wow I think it was the best football game I've ever been to. Joe is convinced that I am goodluck. :) (Pics: above- me Christie, Shalece, Andrea. below- me, Joe, Parker, Tom)

Oh and yes....Cosmo! hehe What an awesome game! I lost my voice at that sucker.
Well world, I'll keep you posted on the fun stuff I do down here...mostly I just study and go to class...but we throw in some goodness in there every so often :) hehe

Trip #2- california

Rather than going to my first Thursday and Friday of college...I went to Disneyland! Are you kidding?! Of course I'd do that! The whole fam packed up and headed to California for an awesome last vacation before Russell's mission. It was such a BLAST!

We pretty much had to kick everyone out in order to get enough room for our whole family in this picture. Probably shocked people..

Thanks Walt :)

Me and the Olsen boys checkin out the letters

Linds and Luke

Yeah..realized the next day that it had my initials haha AwesomeMy buddy at Disney. Me and Ashlyn played all day! This was on Splash Mountain. She started freaking out and telling me to put my camera away heheI decided I love pictures on rides. Look at cute Ashlyn and Katie screamin their guts outWell they had good reason to..we got SOAKED! I've never been that wet from that ride!Cute Seth-man puttin his arms up on Big Thunder MountainTy-guy lovin the tea cups

Ashlyn's first time on Space Mountain. haha
She was a little nervous, squeezin my hand pretty tight.

California Screamin...Russell and I thought our pose was appropriate..This is the gang on waiting/stroller duty. We looked awesome :)Getting stoked for the Toy Story ride. So fun!Happiest place on earth or no? Gettin together for an asian picture :)
After two full days of Disney we went to Six Flags! Oh my word it is the BEST place ever! I almost blacked out on a few rides! I was going to try to take pictures of all the rides I went on, but they were too big for the picture. Wow if you love rollercoasters, make a trip to six flags! I want to go again!
Thanks mom and dad for an amazing vacation!

pretty hawaii pics continued...